Return to Work

Returning to work was good...the routine was familiar, it was good to see familiar, friendly faces, and it was a good distraction.  Of course, I'm just getting back up-to-speed and folks have been great about giving me updates and providing me info without burdening me too much with issues (at least not yet).

I did have to leave work a little early to go to the funeral home and pickup copies of the death certificate (seems surreal) and to pay the funeral bill.

Thankful moment:  That Ed and I had savings so that Dan and I could give him the funeral he deserved and that we wanted to give him.  Thank you also to Beers and Story for posting their price list on their Web site so I had some clue what to expect (and I wasn't far off either).

An added bonus of having to leave the office a bit early is that I was home early and it was a beautiful evening.  I spent some time in the yard after I got home (Ed would be pleased) and got a few other things done around the house before I made some dinner.

Eating dinner alone is still difficult.  I did read the paper and complete that darn puzzle that brought me tears a couple days ago.  It took me a bit longer than usual to do the puzzle which tells me my concentration is a bit off, but I finished it!  I also fixed the running toilet.  Okay, it really wasn't that difficult, but I watched Dan fix it last week and I took care of it myself tonight.  Of course, don't ask me how long it was running before I noticed it though!

Overall I did pretty good most of the day though.  It always surprises me at what causes the tears to come and tonight it was opening cards.  Now I've opened plenty of cards over the past week and I usually can hold it together unless I'm reading the personal messages people write.  Tonight, though, even some of the printed verses made me cry.  I appreciate all the cards and messages, but some of those that specifically touched me tonight follow.

"When you have to say good-bye to someone you've shared your life with, someone so close to your heart, there's not even a way to put into words the love you had for them.  ...know that even deep loss cannot take away deep love."

"Grief, like the ocean, comes in waves only to recede and come yet again. But with it comes healing.  Memories wash ashore and are bathed by the golden sun.  Grab hold of those memories and let them fill the emptiness."

"Those we have truly loved, we will always love, and that which was deeply felt, we will always feel.  Remember, death can take all things save one--Love remains, for Love alone is real."

Thank you all for your cards of sympathy, support, thoughts, and prayers.  I know I will read them many times over and sometimes they will make me smile and other times they will make me cry.  And that's okay...