Pine Grove

I've decided to update the blog this evening instead of in the morning because I had a good evening and I wanted to capture this feeling while it was still with me.

After work this evening, I headed over to Pine Grove Golf Course.  I still had the King of the Grove plaque that they had brought to Ed's wake to display and I wanted to return it to them.  Ed played in the Wednesday night handicap league and so each Wednesday since the funeral I tentatively planned to try to get over to Pine Grove to return the plaque, but something else always seemed to come up.

Tonight though, as I left for work, the sun was still shining and I didn't have any other firm plans so off I went.  In all the years Ed belonged to Pine Grove, I never went there until just last year.  It was one day after his treatment and he wanted to stop by the golf course to see about Dan filling in for him temporarily while he wasn't feeling good.  He asked if I wouldn't mind us going and I'm glad I did since I learned where to go and also got to meet Dagmara for the first time that day.

Today when I arrived the parking lot was full and inside the club house I found Dagmara, Gil, and Shirley who all greeted me with hugs.  While I waited for Mike to come in after his round, I had a bite to eat for dinner and Gil kept me company.  I think Mike was surprised to see me and we greeted each other with smiles and hugs.  Mike then introduced me to most of the guys.  As Gil pointed out, these were Ed's friends...the guys he saw every week over many years.  These were people I had never met before, but they all knew Ed and liked him a lot.  And they spoke highly of Ed and how much they enjoyed him and now how much they also missed him.  I felt so welcomed and I know Ed was smiling down on us and glad that they all showed such care to me.

I can see why Ed liked it at Pine Grove.  There were times over the years when he questioned why he drove to Northampton to play golf each week wehn there were courses closer to home.  But he knew, and I could tell tonight as well, that it was the people that brought him back to Pine Grove each year.  I wish I had gone to visit earlier--some Wednesday evening when Ed was still here so I could see him with these guys.  I can just picture them laughing and telling stories while sharing a drink or having a bite to eat.

Of course if I had done that, they all would have wondered why I was there..."the wife" checking up on Ed.  Tonight, though, I could see them looking at me--some wondering who this woman was hanging out on a men's night, some with sad eyes knowing I'm Ed's "widow" (I hate that word, by the way), and some trying to get another glimpse of Ed or have another moment with Ed through me.  For it was clear that they missed him as well and they were saddened by his passing also.  And as much as I found comfort being among them, I would like to think that my being there also brought them some level of comfort as well.

As I got ready to leave, there were more hugs and invitations to stop by again--they're all there every Wednesday.  I don't think I'll be there every Wednesday, but I do plan to go back for King of the Grove later in the year.  And Dan is planning to come back for that evening as well and play a round with the guys.  And if Dan ever feels like playing a round of golf at some point this summer, I'd be glad to go and just sit on the deck and relax.  Because, just like Ed did for many years, I find comfort there and it feels like home.

Thank you all at Pine Grove for being Ed's friends and for being such an important part of his life.  And thank you Gil, Shirley, Dagmara, Mike and all the guys for making me feel so welcomed as well.  I know Ed thought fondly of all of you.  I don't think he could have ever imagined how caring and thoughtful you all would be to me as well.  Thank you for a special evening and helping me to smile and laugh even if for just a bit.