Monday was difficult as we waited by the phone for the call from the medical examiner's office. It never came and so our grief turned a bit to anger. How could they tell us they would call us and we waited by the phone all day and no call came. We've all experienced that...waiting for a call or for a service person to come to the house--you wait, you listen, you don't dare do something that would cause you to miss the call or the doorbell or whatever. And then it never comes and then you're just pissed off!
So Tuesday when my Mom got the option to continue to wait or drive to the medical examiner's office in Worcester, she of course, elected to take control of this situation and drive to Worcester. No more waiting by the phone for these Jasmin ladies! And once she was able to meet with the medical examiner, then everything else started to fall into place. They were able to release Michael's body and the funeral home and the church could confirm when we could have his funeral. What a relief it was when we could finally say Friday at 9:30! It gave us a definite date and time to move forward to. And we were so thankful that this was not dragging into the following week!
With the funeral time set, we had our list of "to do's" (we like our checklists) and worked through them. We together picked out Michael's urn, made photo collages, finalized his obituary and eulogy, made necessary phone calls, made arrangements for the reception, and picked readings and hymns for the Mass.
Thursday was another cold and gray day and we asked Michael to warm things up a bit for Friday. And sure enough, the sun peeked over the horizon Friday morning and the day, although still cold, was sunny with a bright blue sky. Now, I don't know how much pull Michael really has up in Heaven and one could say God himself was listening to our prayers. But I also know that my brother could have nagged God for quite some time to grant us our wish!
Now I know this can sound odd, but Michael's funeral on Friday was a nice day. Not nice that we were laying my brother to rest. But that the Mass, the eulogy, the presence of friends and family--all of this could not have been better. It was a day to cry and a day to smile and laugh and hug and to remember Michael and to be gifted by the love of family and friends who were present either physically or in spirit and thought to support my family and celebrate Michael with us.
We are in awe at the number of people who turned out and the number of people who baked and helped with the reception. We know we are truly blessed and thank God for all of you.
After the reception, our family went out to lunch at Zoe's. It was a nice lunch--a typical Jasmin family get together. It was a quiet time to talk about the day and to spend a little more time together before we all went our separate ways.
My heart still aches and sadness still comes and I am still in awe that it was just a week ago that our lives changed forever. But it is a reminder of the importance of family and friends and living each day to the fullest and living it being kind and considerate of others and showing compassion, care, and love. I have the following quote on my refrigerator: "I've learned that you should always leave loved one with loving words. It may be the last time you see them." That is so true and I know my family finds comfort knowing that the last time each one of us saw Michael, we did leave him with loving words and a hug and there is no doubt that he knew we loved him and he loved us. That is living life with no regrets and if that is what we all need to be reminded of this week, then that is Michael's parting gift to us all.
May God bless you all and may Michael rest in peace with God and with our Dad and all our other departed relatives. Until we meet again...
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