This says it all. I have been given permission not to use the word "should" and it feels so liberating. At this point in my grief journey, there are no "should"s.
--How "should" I feel?
--Where "should" I be in this journey?
--How "should" I be spending my time?
--What "should" I do?
Instead, I will feel. I will journey. I will spend my time just being. And I will give myself a break from what I "should" be doing. And if someone tries to tell me how I "should" be feeling (you "should" be happy, you "should" be grateful, etc.), I will dismiss their comment.
This is now a "should" free zone!
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