2016: A New Year

Another year has passed.
Another year of my so called life.
Another year older.

I am tired.  I am exhausted.  Each year that passes just wears me out.
So with a new year, like so many others, I have great hope for the new year.
Maybe this year I can find happiness.
Maybe this year I can feel good about life.
Maybe this year won't feel like groundhog day where each day blurs into the next, repeating the same grief day after day.

One can only hope.
Of course, I realize I have to work at it as well.
But I don't have the energy so I will push myself.  A little each day.

I have decided that 2016 is going to be about me.
Being selfish and finding and doing what makes me feel good and makes me feel happy.
Of course the hard thing is that I don't know what I want or what I need.
Not without Ed.  HE made me feel good; HE made me happy.

I have spent most of my life, in particular the last few years, doing what others expect or what they need me to do for them.
But this year is going to be about what I want, what I need...yes, very selfish I know.
So that is my challenge for 2016.
I'll let you know how that goes...